Will You Into My Will (Chapter 19)


‘Carem do you see a keeper when you see one?’ Mia questions me, looking at the  direction from where  guys were coming from, after their grocery shopping.

‘Yeah  James looks like a keeper’ I reply, scanning his Tesco bags full of chips and drinks for our small evening get together party.

‘He probably is. I meant Brandon’ she implies, signalling me with corner of her eyes.

‘I think so..’ I stammer with hesitation, looking at Brandon struggle  with another handful of plastic bags, heading towards  us.

‘I meant that silly’ Mia signals at me again. ‘Look  closer at his right chest’.

‘Oh’ I let out a surprise cry, when I see a red rose stem stick out, that was strapped  neatly on his front chest, inside his summer jacket.

‘He probably has no idea, the wind is blowing away his outer. And his secret is already busted’ Mia laughs.  ‘Try pretending  like you didn’t see it and act surprised when he gives it to you in the evening okay?’.

‘Yes Mam’ I reply under my breath.

‘Beautiful summer girls!’ James  sparkles with excitement, throwing himself  in Mia’s lap the next moment and  casting away the bag carelessly beside us.

‘Hey careful with that..’ Brandon snickers,unloading his stock  as well and sitting down beside me,  leaving a kiss on my forehead.

‘It’s a beautiful summer. Isn’t it?’ he remarks,  zipping up his summer coat and looking around  in the park. ‘Indeed’ I reply feeling the fresh breeze of wind in my face. ‘Warm out doors, fresh air and greenery. What is there not to love?’

‘Try resting your  head in the soft green grass and gaze at the sky. Watch the clouds float away.. try counting them too if you can. Trust me, you will love it even more’ he suggests, gently patting the ground next to him, looking directly into my eyes.

‘Why not?’ I laugh amazed.

I never took Brandon to be a loner type of guy.  Yes, spiritual may be but not the type who loved being alone, once in a while, gazing at the sky. Undoubtedly, this side of him added a plus point for him in my chart. And the more i was getting to know him, the more fascinated i was feeling, for his character .

I rest my head onto the soft supple grass beside him.

This is how I should be feeling, what I should be appreciating at this time of  my life..’ I remind myself , watching a soft cotton cloud that looked like Santa’s beard pass by. ‘Watch that one’ Brandon points out, lying next to me as well, showing his finger to small fluffy clouds that looked like a disc ‘It’s a plate, isn’t it?circular and stuff’  i comment. ‘Nah it’s a pizza. A chicken pizza to be exact, like that one i had in peri-peri. Thick base, mozarella cheese, mushroom toppings sliced just the way i wanted them and…’ he explains.

‘You are always thinking of food Brandon’ i reply, lazy, now almost dozing off, in summer heat. ‘And you..’ he replies instant, almost inaudible to me .

But I heard that. And i ignored. Or may be i didn’t hear it at all. Because, for the moment, I am just too grateful for the summer warmth and the company of beautiful friends. I just want to  enjoy the simplicity of life and avoid the torment of complex emotions. And breathe. Breath my life,in an out, openly and peacefully..knowing that if i miss out on this, tomorrow will always be there for me. Waiting for me, to get my choices right. And I don’t need to rush and i don’t need to comply. In fact, I don’t need to know anything about, what the day-after will bring to me right away.. I just need  to hold, get a grip onto myself and stay put. Firm on my ground,  till the day, i really feel ready to free myself   from my own cage of emotional strings, that has been long holding me.


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