Will You Into My Will (chapter 29)

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Will is wrong man at a right time. That’s what he is!!

I stare at Will, as he steps out of his Black Ford, wearing his regular denim jeans and a casual white T with a bouquet on his hands.  He approaches me guardedly. Perhaps unsure, if i might throw the pot i am holding at him, given that i was still furious over him for what he did to me last time. But, i stand frigid. Not moving an inch..signalling him that it was ok, to come near me, at least for once. 

No matter how i looked at him and when i looked at him, he was always going to look so beautiful to me.’

I shove away the hurt i felt there for a moment, noticing the fear in his eyes. And wondered if he could see that.. i couldn’t help but gaze at him, dumbfounded; even after all the things we have been through, without letting tears drop on me.

‘Hey Babe’ he calls, hugging me tightly around his arms. My head rests on his shoulders, sub consciously melting in his comfort.  My tears floods in more, as i do so..

‘I want Will!!I want Poochie!!’ My insides, unbolts the cell. My heart aches, screaming, rampaging on my rib cage wanting  to hold him tighter, more..

But i force myself away. Slowely pushing him away from me.  He kneels down at Pooch’s grave and gently lays a bouquet of orchids, mixed in with white roses stems. Then, patting in the heap of the mud, the one that we just poured over pooch, he wishes him farewell. Seeing him, bid goodbye.. suddenly i wail. I wail hard.. sitting on the muddy ground, crying.. wanting my dog back.

After an hour, Will and i, we both are resting in an open field. Somewhere far..i don’t know. I asked him to drive me anywhere but near here. We sit there  watching the wind sway the tall grasses  and sun shimmering light, till it faded to dull yellow..speaking nothing. Nothing at all.

‘Why did you come Will?’ i ask him, after our long hour of silence.  ‘I wanted to..’ he replies, his voice softening and fading away.

‘What did it mean?’ i question myself. ‘That he didn’t call me for a month now and out of nowhere he decides to ring me up today..when pooch..’ 

‘Its time baby’ he gives a light tap on my shoulder, shrugging me off my train of thoughts. ‘Stay’ i reply, looking at him then bending myself over to him and trapping him under my body. I kiss him.  I didn’t want to lose him..Never.

‘Not here. Not like that.’ Will stops me, after a while, when i start undoing his pants.

‘Why, don’t you want me?’ i ask  upset by his refusal. This was the last thing i wanted to hear..

‘Its not that’. He replies, pulling me to sit on his lap. ‘I don’t want you to do anything, you would regret. You are not thinking straight’. 

‘I am thinking straight!’ I answer back, tearing up once again. ‘oh how i hate these traitors!!’

‘Tell me you want me..please’ i pressure him, turning back at him again and bringing his hands together with my hands, to cup my breasts.

‘I do want you’ he replies, lowering me down again, holding by my hips and landing a soft kiss on my lips. ‘I will always want you. Can’t you tell? We could spend the whole night out here or the motel wherever you want to go. But not tonight. It’s just not right’.

‘Ok Mister!!’ i snap, flustering with anger now. It bothered me, why he didn’t want to touch me..why he didn’t find me attractive enough to bed. But, i have already thrown myself at his table.Haven’t i? If he wasn’t going to have me, it was his loss! 

‘Take me home then, right now!’ i command, putting on my clothes as fast as i could. If i was raging bull, consider me one getting charged up, stamping my foot on the ground, ready to toss that miniature man with red flag..30 feet high above the ground.

Yeah..’ he says, divided, unsure what to say, handing me my underwear.

‘Not this one!!’ i throw it off back on his face. ‘Apparently it does not look advertising enough! Can’t you see?’ 

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