We didn’t talk much on dinner today. Will’s eyes were settled on reading some magazines the whole the time we sat together. Occasionally, he lifted his head to look at me, but that was just it. No words. He was treating me like some stranger, he had just picked on a highway.
After i got back to bed having brushed my teeth, i realised he was still awake. I was hoping he’d be asleep because i wanted to avoid his interrogation, which i knew for sure he was waiting to have with me.
I slip inside the blankets silently, pretending i didn’t notice him stare at me. But then he gave me no choice, ‘You are late’ he commented.
‘Oh you are still up?’ i question, pulling up an innocent front.
‘Well, Goodnight baby’. I give a kiss on his cheek before he could reply, turning to opposite side, to face away from his probing look.
He doesn’t reply. I feel a chill on back of my neck, from his cold stare.
‘Beep’. My cell phone vibrates with incoming message alert.
‘Not again. Oh God’ I panick mentally, struggling to reach for my phone.
‘I will take that’ Will snatches it from my hand within seconds. And before i can say anything, he reads it.
‘Who is it from?’ i stammer.
‘No one we should be worrying about’ he replies, tucking cellphone away under his pillow.
I look at him and the pillow, under which my cell phone beeps two more times with new messages.
‘Come here’ he says, pinning me to the bed. His both hands against my wrists. ‘You have important things to worry about’.
‘Who was it Will?.’ I ask again.
No reply. He keeps his silence, moving towards the foot end of our bed dragging on his knees, appearing aloof, drawing away my blankets as he does so. I shiver. I am nervous. I know this pattern. I have seen him like this before. This is the side of him, i am scared of..
Folding my legs on to my knees, he pushes away my t shirt exposing my belly. ‘Will’ i call, more loud this time. He proceeds, absent-minded, his hand movements controlled, robotic, removing my under wear.
Lifting my hip up then he puts a cushion underneath me, inclining me at an angle. Moving closer, he attempts to part my legs. I resist, vigorously.
He scowls, again, for more than a fifth time, gripping firmly on my hands and pressing my legs. For the first time now, i understand ‘his silent treatment’. He is angry. He is jealous. It is Brandon who was texting me and whatever he wrote, was not to his liking.
‘Oh God’ i sigh. ‘I don’t want to feel what i felt the last time..’.
He remains hushed.
He observes my expression intently, tight-lipped while manipulating me around. Still looking, without breaking his eye contact for seconds, he then puts his fingers to his mouth sucks on them for a while and advances them to my opening between my legs. He is intimidating me.. he knows it. But he doesn’t mind. He is too full of hatred, lust, anger and of himself..
Up and down, round and round, in and out, his fingers run without a break, inside me, till he thrusts them deeper in me with a sharp force. ‘Stop it!’ i scream. ‘Open your legs then’ he snaps. ‘Lets just fuck. That’s how i like doing you!’
Its paralysing to hear such despicable words from the man you love.. I give away. If its only body that he wants, he can have it. I am not stopping him.
One moment, I love this man like i could love nothing else in world and the other moment i hate him, hate him from the very pits of my heart!